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I must embrace social media.I must embrace social media.I must embrace social media.I must embrace social media.I must embrace social media.I must embrace social media.I must embrace social media.I must embrace....

And The Next American Idol Judge Is (drumroll).....

A hologram of Michael Jackson!

Please American Idol...Do what Michael unfortunately did and DIE ALREADY!!!

Maybe they should change their format and make it a competition to be a judge instead of a singer.  Throw Nicki Minaj, Mariah Carey, Puffy(I will NOT call him Diddy), and whoever the hell else they are considering into a remote part of Antarctica, and they must get back to Hollywood using nothing but a Motorola StarTAC phone.  The losers must stay in Antarctica (Please be Puffy Please be Puffy Please be Puffy).

Now THAT, I would watch!! (who am I kidding.  Of course I wouldn't)

Sidenote:
Look how far we've come!

Uppity Negro

This is why Hampton never be the real H.U.  Yeah, King may not have had locks or braids but King spoke to looking past the surface of a person and paying attention their substance.  What's next, calling every white man you pass "mister"?  Will there be a hat tipping policy?  No eye contact??  Damn Shame!!

Sidenote: I do agree cornrows should be banned.  Not because they lack professionalism but because it's 2012!!! Let 'em go!!

from Gawker.com
Hampton U Dean Bans Cornrows and Dreadlocks: ‘Martin Luther King Didn’t Wear It’

Hamilton Nolan

At Hampton University, a historically black college in Virginia, MBA students are banned from wearing cornrows or dreadlocks, thanks to an edict from Business School Dean Sid Credle.

*Covers face with hands, shaking head slowly*

Dean Credle disagrees and says when people criticize the ban for denying cultural aspects of style, he believes cornrows and dreadlocks have not been a historically professional look.

"I said when was it that cornrows and dreadlocks were a part of African American history?"

Credle added, "I mean Charles Drew didn't wear, Muhammad Ali didn't wear it. Martin Luther King didn't wear it."

*Continues shaking head, gaping open-mouthed in amazement.*

As everyone knows, if you want a good HBCU starting with "H," go to Howard.

Beat the Pu$$y Up!!

Why do cats sound like they are on a torture rack or reenacting a scene from "50 Shades of Grey" when they are mating??

Because they really are reenacting a scene from "50 Shades of Grey"!!

According to Franny Syufy on www.about.com:

Whole male cats have barbed penises (much like a fishhook), and upon withdrawal, the female cat will often scream (whether from ecstasy or pain is questionable).

The male (Tom) cat is literally tearing it up!!

What does a barbed penis look like??

YIKES!!!!



Something tells me the Cheshire Cat from "Alice and Wonderland" may be into the "barbed"!

from www.petplace.com

From Male to Female

As odd as it may seem, male cats spring on a receptive female and bite her in the scruff, pinning her down as they intromit for a few seconds of orgasmic pleasure. The bite is not a faint one, either, and is performed with sufficient tenacity to allow the brief mating process to take place without the possibility of the female turning on the male or running away. The female's behavior both before and after mating may explain the male's forceful approach that effectively secures the target of his amorous attentions and at the same time protects him from reciprocal hostility.


From Female to Male
As a female comes into heat, her impending receptivity attracts one or more suitors who, typical males that they are, all want to get on with the business of mating in haste without much courtship and with all due haste. Not so,slow down, is the signal the female gives as she waits for the correct moment before lowering her drawbridge.Premature advances are met with aggression, hissing, spitting, and batting, until just the precise moment for optimum biological success. At this point she allows the advance, stoically accepts the neck bite, braces herself, and no doubt "thinks of England." However, the very moment the dastardly deed is done, and perhaps not least due to the sudden withdrawal of his nibs barbed penis, she lets out a cry, rolls over, and (seemingly) tries to take a hunk out of him, swatting and pawing as she hisses and spits various indignities. All in all, not the most amorous of encounters.

Bad Kitty!

White and Whiter

Republican Presidential and Vice Presidential Candidates Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan

Please vote!

Mitt Romney's Wet Dream:

Maybe The Brothers Brothers Tom and Tom can be their opening act at the Republican National Convention.  That will bring in the minority vote!

What's my view??

Fool Me Once....

TAGLINE:
"This Kidnapping Was More Avoidable Than The Last"

Christian Mingle??

Does the concept of Christian Mingle.com defeat the whole purpose of trusting in God??

I have $100 for anyone who can find an Internet dating reference in the Bible!!

Obama's Got This Election In The Bag IF.....

...the Curiosity Rover sent to Mars discovers Martians!!

NASA gets to preserve its budget, it was on Obama's watch, AND Mitt Romney will finally be able to phone home after taking the L in this election! EVERYBODY WINS!!!

"I'll Get You My Pretty"

Was the Good Witch, the Witch of the North, susceptible to water like the Wicked Witch of the West in "The Wizard of Oz"?  If so, then how was she able to float in a bubble? Hmmmmmm......

And why was the Lion such a flaming h......... well, that's another story!

For those with extra time on their hands....
from www.straightdope.com

Why does water make the Wicked Witch of the West melt?

January 1, 2002

Dear Straight Dope:

I've never understood why The Wizard of Oz's Wicked Witch of the West melts when Dorothy splashes water onto her face. I've only seen the MGM movie and have never read the books, so I might be missing some essential tidbit of info, or maybe I'm just an underread fool who can't pinpoint the tiniest bit of symbolism or metaphor, but so what? Could you please fill me in?

— C.M.M, Ithaca, New York

I was going to tell you to go read the book, you ignoramus, but then I realized the book isn't clear either. By "the book," of course, we mean The Wonderful Wizard of Oz by L. Frank Baum, published in 1900 and a children's favorite ever since.

Probably everyone in the western world knows the story through the movie, although the book still has a huge audience of new and repeat readers each year. Dorothy confronts the Wicked Witch of the West, throws a bucket of water on her, and the Witch melts into a puddle of scum. Note that it's not just "splashing some water on her face," she gets doused with a whole bucket, in both book and movie. But still, why should water affect her so?

The book provides a few hints: 

(1) When Dorothy first arrives in Oz, her house falls on and kills the Wicked Witch of the East. After Dorothy has some conversation with the Munchkins and the good Witch of the North, they noticed that "the feet of the dead Witch had disappeared entirely and nothing was left but the silver shoes." The Witch of the North explains that "She was so old that she dried up quickly in the sun."

We note the reference to being "dried up." (As an aside, the silver shoes in the book became ruby slippers in the movie. Margaret Hamilton, who played both Wicked Witches, was a fan of the Baum books and asked the producer Mervyn Le Roy why the shoes had been changed to red. She reported that Le Roy said that in Technicolor red stood out better against the Yellow Brick Road than did silver.)

(2) When the Wicked Witch of the West has captured Dorothy and her friends, she enslaves Dorothy for a time, so the reader has a chance to observe the witch's behavior. (The movie alters this scenario.) The Witch lusts after the silver shoes but "was too much afraid of the dark to dare go in Dorothy's room at night to take the shoes, and her dread of water was greater than her fear of the dark, so she never came near when Dorothy was bathing. Indeed, the old Witch never touched water, nor ever let water touch her in any way."

This doesn't tell us why water is so potent against the Witch, but it set the stage, and lets us know the Witch is aware of water's power over her. We also note that the Wicked Witch is afraid of the dark, an amusing reversal of expectations. 

(3) "Once the Witch struck Toto a blow with her umbrella and the brave little dog flew at her and bit her leg, in return. The Witch did not bleed where she was bitten, for she was so wicked that the blood in her had dried up many years before."

First, note that the WWW carries an umbrella, instead of the more traditional broom. This ties in neatly with her fear of water. (The movie, sadly, reverts to the traditional image of a broom.)

Second, note that the Wicked Witch of the West was, like her sister the Witch of the East, "dried up."

(4) After Dorothy throws the bucket of water on her:

. . . the Witch began to shrink and fall away. "See what you have done!" she screamed. "In a minute I shall melt away."

"I am very sorry, indeed," said Dorothy, who was truly frightened to see the Witch actually melting away like brown sugar before her eyes.

"Didn't you know water would be the end of me?" asked the 

Witch, in a wailing, despairing voice.

"Of course not," answered Dorothy; "how should I?"

How should she, indeed? The obvious response, it seems to me, is that the Witch was was so "dried up" that the contact with water disintegrated or dissolved her, much as a dried up parchment would crumble to ash if hit with a stream of water.

Going one step further, Dr. Douglas A. Rossman, writing "On the Liquidation of Witches" in the Baum Bugle, Spring 1969, suggests that the melting of the Wicked Witch is a chemical process. Normally, the molecules of a substance (or Witch) stick to each other, a phenomenon called adhesion. However, adhesion may be broken down by water or by some other powerful force (such as a house falling from the sky). The Witch has no blood or other bodily fluid; little is holding her molecules together. The water breaks down the weak adhesion of her body so that she melts away. Son of Dex says this is similar to the way sugar dissolves in water. Similarly, the impact of Dorothy's house landing on the Wicked Witch of the East breaks down the adhesion of her molecules, so she crumbles to dust.

On a more symbolic level, there's a long tradition of water being antithetical to witches. A commonly prescribed trial for an accused witch was the ordeal by water: the suspect was tied up and tossed into a river. If she floated, she was guilty, and would be burned at the stake (hence, the water-and-fire making a neat little symbolism). If she sank and drowned, shucks, guess she wasn't a witch after all. Water is associated with baptism, and thus the water of the river rejects the witch as satanic. This type of trial was carried out as late as the 1690s.

Robert Burns, writing a note to his poem "Tam O'Shanter" in 1790 says: "It is a well known fact that witches, or any evil spirits, have no power to follow a poor wight any farther than the middle of the next running stream." So the association of water as hostile to witches is a long-standing tradition that Baum possibly drew from.

Taking a different tack, Celia Anderson, in "The Comedians of Oz" (Studies in American Humor, Winter 1986-87), notes gleefully that the Wicked Witch "is justly destroyed by that emblem of household drudgery, a bucketful of water." This is more amusing since, in the book, the Witch enslaves Dorothy and forces her to perform menial household chores.

Henry Littlefield, in "The Wizard of Oz: Parable on Populism" (American Quarterly, Spring 1964), posits that the Witch symbolizes malign Nature. (Cecil cited this article in his column about Oz symbolism.) She "uses natural forces to achieve her ends," including wolves, crows, and bees, all of which tormented American settlers of the late 1800s. Water represents the most precious commodity to the drought-ridden farmers on the great plains. Thus, water brings an end to hostile or malign nature. Baum himself lived in Aberdeen, South Dakota, from 1888 to 1893, and so was well aware of the Great Plains symbolism.

Tying this all together, we can say that water represents life, while witches are the apotheosis of death and decay. Light chases away darkness, good triumphs over evil (eventually, one hopes), and water melts witches. QED.  

Please, any wiccans reading this, we DON'T need any mail about how wiccans are maligned or stereotyped by Baum's story. Notwithstanding the movie, Baum's Wicked Witch is quite different from the fairy-tale wicked witch, although it draws heavily on that tradition. Baum's Wicked Witch of the West is petty, afraid of the dark, selfish, and mean--a spoiled child, in many ways, and very much Baum's own creation. We're also aware that wiccans aren't really melted by water, thanks very much.

If you enjoyed the Oz book(s) and movie, you might also like Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West by Gregory Maguire, a "biography" of the Wicked Witch of the West from childhood to Dorothy.

REFERENCES:

The Annotated Wizard of Oz by L. Frank Baum, edited and with notes by Michael Patrick Hearn, W.W. Norton Company, New York, 2000.

A Moment of Self-Realization

After finishing my kickboxing class I realized that as an adult, if presented with a fight, I would promptly and swiftly get my ass kicked.  No Form. No Power. No Chance in Hell!!

Legalize It!

I am considering starting a petition asking that marijuana use be legalized for one sole purpose....TO SAVE WEEZY!  I can't take anymore raps about the alphabet or vowels, or sucking it til its raw(yuck).  For the sake of "hip hop" PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE.....Legalize it!!

OOPS...Wrong Picture  

Let's try this again....

Let's free Weezy...from himself!